We the Lost - Application

[metachrosis]

Player Name: Kiwi
Preferred Pronouns?: she/her
Player Contact: snailyjayne @ Plurk
Other characters in play? none

Character Name: Espio the Chameleon
Canon: Sonic the Comic
Game Transplant: Carvaka (previously from Witches Reign)
Original App: Witches Reign, Carvaka
Game Summary:

Witches Reign

Set 20 years in the future of Final Fantasy VIII. A powerful Time Compression spell cast by a sorceress had a ripple effect through multiple realities. As a result, many people were drawn to the source world, and popped up all over the place. With the world responding to these off-worlders with fear and hate, the mercenary organisation known as SeeD brought them to their academy Balamb Garden, giving them a home and an education with the intention of recruiting them into the organisation. Unfortunately, political drama and xenophobia ensued, as recruiting such powerful and potentially dangerous individuals was not a popular decision. It also didn't help that the continuing effects of Time Compression did some rather strange things to reality.

Carvaka

A post-apocalyptic sex game. The world ended. Everything that characters thought they knew turned out to be merely an illusion, and eventually that illusion broke and revealed the truth - a ruined wasteland with a very tentative grip on reality, that could be unpredictable and confusing. This world ran on belief, with a handful of natives able to alter elements of the world to their will. The problem was that the characters were not entirely real themselves, and this world was heavily influenced by belief. Should people let the truth of reality get to them too much, their existence would fail. To prevent fading from existence, a distraction was required, and the most reliable distraction was sex. The more 'real' someone was through this distraction, the more their belief could change little pieces of the world and make it at least a little easier to survive.

How long was your character in Game: 18 months approx for Carvaka, around 4 years for Witches Reign
History of Character in their Game:

Due to the length of time in-game meaning there's lots to cover, this has been reduced down to bullet point form, covering the more important events.

◦ After entering a strange and foreign world as a result of a spell, Espio was brought to Balamb Garden in order to escape the xenophobic and fearful attitudes of the world's natives. Chose to study there, and specialised in both Martial Arts and Piloting. Figured this would help in his homeworld, too.

◦ Met several individuals who he would eventually come to see as family, including Marco, Grell, and Tobias. There were a great many others he made friends and acquaintances with during his time here, but these three were the most important to him.

◦ He gained the memories of his reality's collapse at the hands of a certain hedgehog, which was understandably traumatic. He didn't do very well at hiding his despair, though he did try.

◦ Eventually he graduated the SeeD program and became a fully qualified SeeD, basically becoming an elite mercenary working for Garden. His exam involved blowing up a huge crystalline structure known as the Lunatic Pandora.

◦ Though he did take on a few missions, he wasn't that keen on the mercenary aspect because it meant suspending his own views in favour of his client's, and so he took on training to become an instructor in both Intermediate and Advanced Martial Arts.

◦ When Shadow (the hedgehog who destroyed his reality) turned up, Espio attempted to kill him – Shadow is the only person he has ever actually wanted to kill. He lost, though. Badly.

◦ He entered a relationship with Tobias, his best friend. This was with some reluctance, because he freaked out at the confession and honestly thought it would fall flat on its face. He didn't want to not try at all, though...

◦ When Erlea Zabala took over as Commander, Espio became able to take on a temporary human form through the use of a potion. Though it was supposedly a rule for non-humans to use it when outside of the Garden, this was not enforced. Espio proceeded to use it to chill out in public without people gawking at him.

◦ Threw a giant shitfit because he disagreed very strongly with orders from the new Commander – he felt she was putting the Garden's children at risk, forcing them to go through the pain of death repeatedly to prove they couldn't die so easily as long as they had a GF. He resigned in protest. Had every intention of holding his ground.

◦ After, he was approached by a mysterious group known as Sol Invictus and returned to his original position within Garden as a spy. He did not recognise that mind control was involved until much, much later.

◦ He donated Chaotix's old airship (which had appeared through Time Compression) to Garden, and became responsible for many missions involving its use.

◦ During a conflict with a strange mage, he took command of a group aboard his ship. Demonstrated a surprising amount of competence in a leadership role.

◦ Despite the initial reluctance, he genuinely fell in love with his boyfriend. However, he failed to recognise the relationship as being far too dependant and unhealthy. Wound up getting engaged, because he's young, stupid, and impulsive.

◦ Eventually, he suffered a complete meltdown as a result of too many issues piling up: the lingering despair from his reality's collapse, guilt at being the only one (as far as he knew) to have survived, feeling unwelcome in the world, feeling alone in his beliefs and sense of morality and justice, feeling rejected by his 'family', feeling overshadowed by everyone around him, a building sense of unease and confusion at his loyalty to Sol Invictus, feeling powerless to help the one he cared for most of and a fear that he was causing more harm than good with his presence. Wound up withdrawing and started to develop a hatred for himself and everything around him.

◦ Actually realised this and got help.

◦ Formed a close bond with Marco's brother Ace, who was remarkably good at getting through Espio's barriers. Wound up in a casual relationship with him following his fiancé's extended absence. Started to realise that his previous relationship was not one that would have worked out.

◦ He defended Garden during an assault by Sol Invictus, and was relieved that the odd loyalty he had to them did not prevent him from defending his home.

◦ He assisted in preparations for war with Esthar.

◦ During preparations, he unexpectedly wound up trapped in a tin can suspended at the top of a tall tower in a dilapidated and trap-filled castle, and had to be rescued by some scrawny asshole with a walking stick. He'd apparently landed himself in another world with nobody familiar once again, and the natives were quite insistent that his friends in Balamb Garden never existed. That was kind of shit. Also shit: he was trapped in a human form.

◦ Had a rough time dealing with this new world's 'requirements' and exceptionally loose grip on reality. This was a dead world that ran on belief, and survival was dependent on distracting oneself from the harsh truth of reality. This turned out to mean sex, for the most part. Espio was never one for casual sex (the closest he got being his fling with Ace), and he found it a little hard to care much about 'fading', so this was a problem.

◦ Kept most people in this new environment at arm's length, even when he was civil to them. The main exception was Dominic de Luca, who earned Espio's attention by being a highly judgemental asshole who hated non-humans like him. Espio took advantage of his human appearance and gave a false name just so he could argue with him and prove him wrong.

◦ Kept picking arguments with Montague Navarro, who provided monthly status reports and kept a roster of the people present. It was mostly because Espio appreciates things being kept brief and to the point, which was not Monty's strong point... and because picking on people amuses him.

◦ Eventually the castle became a ruined settlement. Espio found a small cottage to live in, but didn't really do much to make it liveable. Many things that Espio would call 'stupid' continued to happen, however, including people temporarily gaining animal features, rumours becoming true, people becoming their alternate selves, and so on.

◦ Tried to keep himself distracted through regular patrols and watching people, helping out when he could.

◦ On one occasion, people were drawn into pockets of 'unreality', containing distorted visions drawn from people's memories. It was on one such occasion that Dominic learned the truth about Espio's identity, but by this point had become fond enough of him he had a lot of difficulty hating him for it. This lead to a rather awkward relationship where they still argued, but became closer, forming a mutual sexual arrangement to help keep one another existing. The two would continue to grow closer, with Dominic eventually confessing romantic feelings for him. Espio turned him down.

◦ A different reality pocket mashed together everyone's worlds, distorting the memories of those within the illusion so that they would believe it was reality. This illusion soon fell apart, with quite horrific effects as people's true memories clumsily fell back into place. For Espio, who already had problems coping with losing two worlds, seeing his home reality collapse in nightmares and time-twists multiple times, and believing everyone he knew was either dead or simply never existed in the first place... well, seeing his friends' faces literally melt off as reality fell to bits around him did not put him in a good place.

◦ It was Monty who found him in a highly emotional state following this, and it was him stopping to help Espio despite the chameleon being constantly rude and deliberately annoying that let them become closer. Next to Dominic, Espio considered Monty one of his most important friends, and would often go to him to vent. Espio was still deliberately annoying, but it became more playful and a little flirty.

◦ Espio quickly formed an attachment with someone who appeared randomly in his house one night with an entourage of talking mice. She seemed a little crazy, but also fun. This was Verity Price, who turned out to be Dominic's future girlfriend - due to timeline shenanigans, Dominic did not remember her. Now, Espio liked Verity, and even let her take the second room in his house, but his competitive spirit couldn't help but see her as a rival.

◦ Following a rather huge and difficult fight with Dominic, who hated Verity and was mad at Espio for liking her and not listening to him about how 'dangerous' she apparently was, the two finally sorted their feelings out and entered a more romantic relationship. Verity was shortly after 'misplaced', and Espio allowed Dominic to move in with him.

◦ He started to participate more in whatever was going on, joining in on two expeditions and agreeing to join in with an ill-fated meeting to brainstorm some kind of law and punishment system.

◦ As time went on he formed more amiable relationships, even friendships with some people. Espio became particularly fond of Tachibana (a girl who reminded him a lot of the 'heroes' back home), Koujaku (a hairdresser who was exceptionally fun to wind up, and also attractive enough to invite some unusually direct flirting from Espio), and Masaki (a cheerful, sociable girl), though he never grew especially close to them.

◦ Not all of his relationships were positive. He took issue with a young lady having trouble expressing her grief, and while he did want to help her, his aggressive approach definitely did not help. He also formed a grudge against another young lady over a comment he found insensitive and insulting, and would respond to pretty much everything she had to say with vitriol.

◦ At some point, the avatar of Truth, Aletheia, stripped the settlement of the belief-based illusions that people relied upon to live. To escape the effects and survive more comfortably, most people left the settlement to form a camp some distance away. After a short while, Espio joined them there. After that... well, he ended up somewhere new again.

How did they change from their canon personality wise (Please explain what caused it to happen?)

For the most part, Espio core remains the same. He is still opinionated, critical and sarcastic, still prone to picking arguments with everyone and their dog, and still maintains his strong sense of justice and desire to protect. However, four years in a more militarised setting, living in a world that hates him just for existing, and having witnessed his reality's collapse have all had a significant impact.

The biggest changes have stemmed from the collapse of his reality, and the death of billions (including his friends, as far as he's aware). This knowledge is something he's struggled to cope with ever since it happened, and it has influenced him in many ways, including:

◦ He feels regret for having never acknowledged his friends as more than allies, acquaintances and coworkers. This, combined with a strong sense of isolation, led him to open up to certain others a little more and made him more willing to call a friend a friend. The influence of his closest friends within Garden has also given him cause to identify his group of friends as family, and though he gripes about it (as he gripes about everything) he takes it very seriously.

◦ He is reluctant to let people get close to him, thanks to pessimism and being accustomed to losing people. Considering he was never good at making friends in the first place, it now takes him a very long time to really connect with someone, and he is prickly and rude to most people by default. Even when he's pleasant to someone (usually people he can find no excuse to be rude to) he keeps them at arm's length. However, he is also now very protective of the few friendships he does make, and will cling to them like his life depends on it. If someone gets past his prickly defences, they likely have a friend for life.

◦ While he initially promised to protect this new world, he eventually found himself acknowledging a disdain for the world's natives, describing them as a replacement pet that was aggressive and bit without provocation. Even though Espio has always had little interest in worlds outside the Special Zone, this actually upset him because he considers this line of thought to go against his nature as a 'hero' – he never cared what other people thought before.

◦ He suffers from a bad case of survivor's guilt, and is frequently inclined to wonder just why he was the only one to survive. There were many other people far more worthy of survival than him, and it's just not right that just one little chameleon should be the only thing left of an entire universe. He has indicated suicidal thoughts and feelings because of it (and a number of other issues), particularly as time has gone on. In Carvaka, he repeatedly let his existence stretch out far longer than he should have.

◦ He tries not to talk about his losses, not wanting sympathy or – especially in Carvaka, where everyone has lost their home worlds – to make his problems out to be worse than anyone else's. He does, however, hate when people dismiss the idea he might have gone through shit, and especially hates it when people let their experiences blind them to how other people have suffered too.

The people Espio met influenced him in a lot of ways, too. He tried to pay little attention to those natives that hated him just for being an off-worlder, but of course they weren't the only people he had to deal with - he also encountered many different people from many different worlds. Some of them, he formed surprisingly strong bonds with.

◦ Espio has become more vocal about his views on justice. Because he spent so much time with a stubborn and anarchic pirate who hates justice and authority and rules and law, he found that he needed to be especially firm and stand his ground when it comes to his own beliefs. This lead to a lot of extended debates, but Espio always did love a good argument.

◦Somehow, several of Espio's closest friends are pirates and criminals. His attitude towards them is a little lax, because they are his friends, but his views on justice still stand mostly intact. He makes it very clear that if they were to do something he disapproves of, they are not exempt from punishment, but it is likely that he would go easy on them if he ever did need to fight unless they cross an unforgivable line.

◦ His overall demeanour has become a bit rougher, thanks to hanging out with pirates. This particularly applies to his language, which used to be squeaky-clean and kid-friendly.

◦ Espio has developed some feelings of inadequacy when comparing himself to other off-worlders around him. In his home reality, he was always rather strong, but in Garden and later in Between, he felt so overshadowed by others that he began to doubt his ability to protect people. Because protecting people has always been a major thing for him, this doubt caused him a lot of distress.

Other changes that came about were as a result of the environment that he found himself in. The first new world was driven by politics and the military, and seemed to be fuelled by paranoia and a constant sense of threat. The second was a broken world that ran on belief and sex.

◦ Espio has come to absolutely hate politics and the media. He already didn't like the media from back home, but here it was just so much worse. He just does not understand how politicians can be so blind to reason over stupid things, and frankly wishes they'd all get back to normal politics stuff like their nation's budget. You know, instead of creating laws that denied off-worlders their most basic rights, or mobilising their military forces to attack a school.

◦ He has also become very wary and suspicious of authority. Many of Commander Erlea Zabala's orders and missions clashed severely with his own views. Zabala put up with his defiance and sometimes even asked for his opinions, but this did little to boost his impression of her. Oh, and then there was the whole issue with Ien and the mind control thing... now, Espio is far more inclined to question and interrogate anyone who poses themselves in a leadership role. This continued through Carvaka, where Espio never developed much respect for anyone and clashed with those he thought were trying to take charge.

◦ Espio has come to consider himself idealistic and naïve, part of why he feels ill-fit for the worlds he's wound up in. For all his pessimism, he still believes there is an inherent good in everyone. While being conscious that he could be very wrong does grind on him, he thinks losing that hope in people would effectively kill the person he is, and so he stubbornly clings to what he considers naivety for fear of losing his sanity.

Finally, the more minor changes in Espio's personality have come from simple age and maturity, and changes in perspective.

◦ Espio is significantly calmer than before, and is nowhere near as easy to provoke into violence. This also means his competitive streak has diminished somewhat, but it will still come out if the right person picks the right provocation. And, of course, he's still a terrible loser who won't admit defeat.

◦ Over time, Espio became fed up with taking things so seriously all the time, as it felt like he was constantly tense and on edge. He came to realise that he really needed to learn how to relax a little. He still doesn't know how to do it properly, but he can get pretty mischievous on occasion. This particularly shows in how much he loves winding people up – it is something he has always been prone to, but now he does it for the sheer fun of it. However, if he's in a rare playful mood and someone goes and spoils it, his temper is likely to flare up.

How did they change from their canon physically (Please explain what caused it to happen?):

Tattoos:

While in Witches Reign, Espio taught himself to hold patterns on his right shoulder and left arm, mimicking the effect of tattoos. The shoulder one is a depiction of a bee, armadillo and a crocodile, which was designed for him by the Greek god Apollo on request. The other is a variation of the Whitebeard sigil from One Piece, as shown on Marco the Phoenix. The crescent was adapted into a circle, and small detached wings were added to the base of the cross.

These are both emotionally significant to Espio, as one depicts the friends he still believes to be long dead, and the other ties him to his found family in Garden.

Scars:

Espio has gained a lot of random scars, thanks to being a very combative little lizard. While one on his left arm is rather prominent (from a gunblade wound during a rather aggressive "sparring" session), it's the large one that covers a fair portion of his right side that's the most noteworthy. This is from an attack by Galbadia Garden - Espio was seriously injured and left incapacitated during the initial assault, leaving him out of action for the entire thing.

Human Form - Witches Reign:

While Espio was eventually able to take on a temporary human form through the use of a magic potion in Witches Reign, doing so came with significant drawbacks as he lost all of his chameleon abilities. This meant he used it primarily for three reasons: hanging out in public without being stared at, coping better with the cold, and sex with humans. Priorities.

Human Form - Carvaka:

In Carvaka that same human form became permanent, and he never understood how or why. In this instance, though, he kept all his usual powers.

Because Carvaka's reality was heavily influenced by belief, occasionally Espio would unconsciously move his non-existent tail, expect his tongue to be stickier than it was, or react to temperature changes the way he used to. After a while, he realised that 'belief' was causing it, and the less conscious he was of his humanity the less human he would be. This naturally became easier over time.

While it most likely couldn't have returned him to his natural form completely, he did manage to regain his lizard tail (scaled somewhat to fit his human size), sticky tongue, and his cold blood. He realises that last one isn't exactly a positive, given that it comes with added sensitivity to the temperature, but it's what he's used to, damn it!

Powers:

Espio can change colours and become invisible. Although he describes his powers as "blending into any background," it is treated as true invisibility in the comic.

In addition, he is also able to scale surfaces regardless of angle, meaning that he can easily run on walls and ceilings.

He appears to be resistant to blunt trauma, taking hits from Mighty (who can punch dinosaurs through concrete) and many other hits without ill effect.

He has a minor level of super strength, able to rip apart Robotnik's elite troopers in one hit, rip signposts out of concrete, and easily break hefty chunks of wood.

Learned to use a Chaos Emerald in Witches Reign, which lets him use short-range teleportation (he can only travel as far as he can see), and temporarily stop time for one target. Both skills have a basis in Sonic game canon.

Furthermore, he also uses it for his "Limit Break", a desperation move which temporarily suspends time for all enemies within a certain range.

Espio was also able to use Junctioning, GFs and Para-Magic (game mechanics from Final Fantasy VIII), but this requires equipment he currently doesn't have. This essentially involves using technology to draw energy from a target and converting it to either augment one's physical capabilities or use as an imitation of magic. A GF (Guardian Force) is a kind of spirit that enables this (and can also be summoned to cause massive damage), but to do so it needs to bond/junction with its user's mind. Excessive use of GFs and junctioning has been known to cause memory loss.

Possessions:

Gifts from people he cares about, including a now rather worn out journal, a stetson hat, a blue scarf, a cozy blanket, throwing stars, and an old fashioned metal bed warmer.

A purple Chaos Emerald.

A few sets of clothing, including his SeeD uniform, cold weather clothing, and casual wear. Not having been human originally, he doesn't have a large wardrobe.

Please provide three samples from your previous game, at least one will have to be third person with context:

Sample One: Nerding out over airships on the B-Garden BBS
Sample Two: A serious conversation with Monty
Sample Three: Dealing with one of the weird belief effects in Between

Notes: Not really?